Oh sweet, sweet Donovan,

     Where has the time gone?  Sometimes too fast, sometimes too slow.  Sometimes I just can’t believe that you are gone.  I never thought in my wildest imagination that we would love a dog as much as we loved you.  I use the term “dog” because to everyone else, you “appeared” to be a dog, but to us, you were soooo much more.  When I tell people how smart you were and how in tune you were with us, I don’t think they believe me.  It’s amazing the connection we all had.  You are as sorely missed today as the day we said goodbye.  Lately I have been remembering those last few days and it brings tears to my eyes…..like right now.  When I came home that last day early from work and you couldn’t even get up to greet me at the door and I found you out in the backyard that you loved so much surrounded by momma and your brother and sister….I lost it.  I laid with you and rested your head on my lap and I cried and cried……like right now.  (Long pause to compose myself)  Donovan, you were truly an amazing gift to us and I never want to lose sight of that.  I still don’t know why you had to leave us and I guess I never will, but I will ALWAYS cherish the time we had with you and hope that we see each other again.  I LOVE YOU my Mr. D!!!  You can still make me cry like a little baby! : (

Love,

Poppa!

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Oh Mr. D, why did you have to leave?  Your time with us was way too short, but you still stole our hearts and took a good portion of them with you.  You deserved everything we gave to you and you gave it back in return.  From your excited greetings at the door to your fierce protection of us, you gave in so many ways.  I hope you enjoyed your time with us, I know we did with you.  You are never too far from my thoughts.  Jessica was just mentioning a song she can’t listen to because it makes her think of you.  She said a few lyrics and I had to make her stop.  I wasn’t welling up with tears, but I could tell if she did keep going, I would probably end up crying.  I love you Mr. D, Donovan, D’skeres………

Love, Poppa

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Your adoption date just recently passed and your momma made references to how you were a booger and how you took over the house with your puppy like madness!  I couldn’t agree more.  We had no idea what we were getting ourselves in for when we adopted you, but we soon found out.  You were one crazy pup!  I remember sleeping in Brandon’s room and doing my best to sleep, but you thought 2a.m was play time!  What we all didn’t know at the time, was that you would grow up to be the BEST dog ever.  From PetSmart puppy training classes when you wouldn’t even go down the stairs and you’d cry, to being the loving, guard dog protector to all of us!  You are missed today as much as when we had to say goodbye and that will never change.  We run across old pictures of you when you were a puppy and it makes us sad & happy!  Sad that you are no longer with us, but happy because we can see in you how happy you were and how much love you had to give to us all!  I love you Donovan and will honor you forever! 

This picture is one of the 1st pictures we took of our Mighty Donovan!  I may have been playing, he wanted to eat me!  I LOVE this picture!

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Just a note to say I love you on this Friday night Mr. D!!  Too many Friday nights have passed since you left and at 8:30 pm on a Friday night, I always find myself thinking of you and remembering…..I love you always, my handsome.  You were an incredible friend and part of this family and you will never be forgotten!!  You are in my heart, always.

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Well Donovan, here it is New Years Eve 2008.  This time last year, we had just lost you a few months prior and the pain was still so fresh.  I just wanted 2007 to be over.  It was filled with pain and loss and stress; the worst year ever!!  I prayed that 2008 would be quiet and peaceful and healing.  Now, as we get ready to enter 2009, I feel that this year was better.  That’s not to say that I don’t still miss you and grieve for you still, cause I do so much!!  I think of you everyday still and I still cry.  I smile when I recall good times and cry when I hear a sad song.  You were and still are a huge and important part of this family, we all miss you so much.  This year, in October, we decided to take a big step and bring another dog into our family.  We all missed the companionship that only a dog can give.  We wanted to try to fill some of the void that you left, which felt to me like a giant crater in my heart.  You know that nobody can take your place.  I wondered at first how I would feel with a new dog in our home.  I worried that I would forget you and felt guilty like I was trying to replace you.  What I discovered though, was that I can love Dakota with all of my heart and give her a place in my heart too and that the way that I love you and cherish you will never change.  As the song says, “Love Remains the Same”.   She has brought smiles, love and happiness into all of our lives.  She is sweet and lovable and goofy, like you.  I know that you would be happy to see me smile this way again!  I do miss you so much and wish you were here to share many more years with us, but I feel that you are with me in spirit and I guess I have to accept that.  I don’t know why you had to leave so soon, but we will be together again someday.  This is the first whole year without you and it will seem strange to say that you have been gone since 2007, it seems so long ago now, yet like yesterday that you were with us!  I hope that 2009 will bring more peace and healing and love.  I will love you always Mr. D….my handsome, handsome boyfriend.  I miss you still.

Love, Momma

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 You know Donovan, there are only a few people that I know that care so much for their animals like we do.  Most people “don’t get it”.  We got it with you and we miss you all the more for it.  Another Christmas is here again and you are not here with us.  I know you are gone and I know how much I miss you, but every once in awhile I stop and catch myself thinking, “Crap, YOU’RE GONE”.  That makes me soooo sad.  I can feel myself starting to get choked up right now just thinking about it.  We have your stocking hung again this year and we’ll continue to hang it until we are no longer here and we are with you.  I know you know about our new girl Dakota.  Donovan, I think you might have found another dog you could be friends with.  She is a sweet girl, I think you two would have gotten along great.  I miss you now as much as I did when you first had to leave us, but Christmas time makes it worse.  I miss you boy, I’m crying now and can’t type anymore…….Merry Christmas Donovan!!!

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A POEM I LIKE, IN TRIBUTE TO DONOVAN:

We will meet again, my friend, a hundred years from today;
Far away from where we lived and where we used to play.We will know each other’s eyes and wonder where we met;
A hundred years apart will not make us forget.Yes, we will meet, I’m sure of that, but let’s not wait til then,
Let’s take a walk beneath the oaks and share this world again.
– Ron Atchison 

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Well, here it is Donovan, the one year mark since we said goodbye.  In some thoughts it feels like a year and sometimes longer and in other thoughts it feels like yesterday.  Instead of filling this with depressing thoughts, I’ll reflect on some good memories I have of you!  There are tons to choose from, but I’d be here for a week if I wrote them all.  I  loved it when you would be in bed with us in the morning and you’d crawl up in between your momma and me and lay there for your lovin’.  If it was real early in the morning, I’d give you the slowest, deepest rub on the head and the back of your neck and I’d get you to go back to sleep.  You were putty in my hands.  If it was a morning and it was about time for all of us to get up, you’d lay there and I’d rub you the same way and then I would stop.  Within a few seconds…..if that long, the tail would start slapping on the mattress and you’d let out the slightest of whimpers to let me know, “Hey, who said stop”?  You’d always take all the lovin’ we’d dish out to you.  Another great memory I cherish is, Friday Night Movie Nights!  You and your popcorn…..what a popcorn piggy!  You loved your popcorn.  To this day, every night that I make popcorn I’ll always toss a few on the floor for you.  I can’t not share my corn with you boy!  And finally and certainly not the last of the great times we shared and this is more like a trait for you, but it was your undying love & devotion to your family.  As much as we poured the love into you, you gave it right back.  Not just kisses and face licks, but your protection of all of us.  Either at home and guarding the house or out on our walks, you “had our backs”.  Heck, we couldn’t even hug too long or joke around with each other and you were up in our face like a ref saying, “Back it up people”.  You protected all of us and you made us feel very safe in our house!  I miss that!  I miss you!  I love you Donovan and I miss you greatly!  Until we see each other again Mr. D……………………

Love Poppa!

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I just read your momma’s post and I wonder myself if anyone ever goes on here.  Do they just read and that’s it or is this just a place for us?  Ya know what?  I don’t care.  I wish more people would join us in talking about you or posting pictures of their own loved ones, but as long as I have a place to tell you stuff, that’s all I need.  I still talk to you a lot, I hope you hear me.  I still always say good morning and good night to you every night.  Even if I forgot to say goodnight and I’m already in bed and I’m all comfortable, I’ll get up out of bed and come say goodnight to you…..you are worth it.  Our new neighbors brought home a puppy a while back and I wish you were here to say hi to him.  They didn’t seem to play much with him or let him come in the house and now he is gone.  What I wouldn’t give for you to be on your bed right now just chillin’ like you always did.  I miss that.  I miss the little things you did.  Like in the evening when we were all out in the front room and we stayed up too late for you, you’d finally give in and get up, give us a look and head down the hallway and get up on our bed.  You were telling us, “Okay people, let’s go to bed’!! There has been talk of getting another puppy/dog in the house and I’m still not sure of how I feel about it.  Like momma said, any other dog will have some very big paws to fill!  You set the mold Mr.D!!!  Sometimes it feels like just yesterday you left us and other times it feels like a lifetime.  As we mark your 10 months being gone from us, I’m sad all over again (like that ever changes) and I miss our canyon walks and our Starbucks runs.  I don’t think you really liked coming back up the hill, but I know you loved the strip mall and all the new smells!  I love you Donovan and miss you just as much!

Love Poppa!

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It has been 10 months ago today that we had to say goodbye to Donovan.  So many people said that time would heal….how much time?  Time has not healed.  I still love and miss him so much, probably more than ever.  Yes, I can talk about him without bursting into tears and I can smile when I think of funny things he did.  Not many people knew him well enough to know that he was also a very funny dog.  He loved to play with his sqeauky ball, esp. right when we were starting a movie.  He seemed quite pleased with himself that he could bite that toy and make a loud sound which seemed to irritate everyone but him and I!!  I would laugh so much when he did that!!  He did the silliest thing we called “rabies”.  He would just start snarling and barking for no reason while he would rub his head on his bed and we would tell him he looked crazy and that he had rabies.  The more we laughed, the more he did it!!  He was a true friend and family member in every sense of the word!!  Our family has felt his loss so terribly.  Sometimes, we think we should get another dog, cause we miss the companionship, but our expectations are very, very high!!  How can another dog ever be everything that Donovan was; a friend, a son, a brother, a loyal and faithful companion that gave every bit of unconditional love that he could in his almost 8 years of life??  I guess we will know when the time is right.  There is a place in my heart that is always for Donovan and he took a piece of it with him when he left.  I have poured my heart out on this website created for him and sometimes I wonder who comes to read these words, maybe I should not share my thoughts with other people.  Bottom line is that this site is to honor Donovan and the more people that read about him, the better.  I would have liked for more people to sign the guestbook instead of just reading the blogs, but in the end, I know who cares and who does not!!  So, on this day, I say, “I love you Donovan”.  I always have and I always will.  The honeysuckle that I planted in the front garden is growing nicely and when I smell the sweet fragrance, it reminds me of our morning walks at the park.  I miss our walks so much!!  I miss your friendship and your greetings at the door when I came home!  Time has not healed, it just has kept going…..

 Love Always,

Momma

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